KATE GOSSELIN: HOW SHE FOOLED THE WORLD - THE RISE AND FALL OF A REALITY TV QUEEN Read online

  KATE GOSSELIN:

  HOW SHE FOOLED THE WORLD

  The Rise And Fall Of A Reality TV Queen

  By Robert Hoffman

  Copyright © 2014 by Robert Hoffman

  All rights reserved 2014. No part of this work covered by copyright

  hereon may be reproduced or used in any form or by any means – graphic,

  electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping,

  Web distribution or information storage and retrieval systems – without

  the written permission of the author.

  First Edition

  Printed in the United States of America

  To Alexis, Leah, Hanna, Joel, Aaden, Collin, Cara and Mady.

  Remember that, no matter what, you will always have each other.

  Stay close to one another. There is nothing more important than family.

  “Children are the magic dreams that we all once were,

  filling the air with laughter and sunshine.

  Carefree, beautiful little gifts from God,

  children are our students, yet they teach us so much.

  Through the eyes of children we see life as a path of adventure,

  with caves to explore, secrets to keep,

  and a lifetime of experiences just waiting to be discovered.”

  – Author Unknown

  “…And I wish I could remember what we ate,

  and what we talked about, and how they sounded,

  and how they looked when they slept that night.

  I wish I had not been in such a hurry to get on to the next thing:

  dinner, bath, book, bed. I wish I had treasured the doing a little more,

  and the getting it done a little less.”

  – Anna Quindlen, Author

  TABLE OF CONTENTS

  PREFACE

  ONCE UPON A TIME …

  THE FORMATIVE YEARS

  WHEN KATIE MET JONNY

  THE ACTION PLAN

  JUST ONE MORE

  JON & KATE 101: HOW DID WE GET HERE?

  A FAMILY UNDER (DISCOVERY’S) CONTROL

  SIGN HERE – OR ELSE!!!

  KATE’S GOD COMPLEX

  THE WORLD ACCORDING TO KATE

  THE WORLD ACCORDING TO KATE – PART 2

  I WANT MY FAKE TV

  THE GOSSELIN GIVE-BACK?

  I DREAMED A DREAM

  “ENTERING THE PROMISED LAND”

  UNDER NEW MANAGEMENT

  FREEBIES

  DIVORCE, REALITY STYLE

  “MOMMY’S JOURNAL”

  CHILD ABUSE?

  KATIE DEAREST

  DADDY’S LITTLE GIRL

  THE LIES AND TIMES OF KATE GOSSELIN

  THE GOOD MOM

  BAD BLOG

  THE HELP

  BETH, A TRUE FRIEND

  WHERE’S AUNT JODI?

  KATIE & JAMIE: BEST FRIENDS FOREVER?

  IN STEVE WE TRUST

  WHO LET THE DOGS OUT?

  THE PAPARAZZI

  KATIE’S MEN IN BLUE

  HIGH-SPEED PURSUIT

  UNDER THE INFLUENCE

  WORK PERMITS AND THE 85/15 SPLIT

  DANCING WITH THE STARS . . . AND KATE

  HOLIDAYS, STAYCATION AND CRUISE, OH MY

  THE BEST DAY

  THE REBRANDING OF KATE GOSSELIN

  TWEET TWEET

  HELL ON WHEELS: THE END OF AN “ERROR”

  THE END?

  EPILOGUE

  PREFACE

  WARNING: For those of you who love Kate Gosselin and support her unconditionally, and think that every bad thing ever said or written about her is a lie, then this book probably isn’t for you.

  “Do not judge, or you too will be judged.

  For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged,

  and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”

  – Matthew 7:1

  That passage is for me. I am a “Gosselin Insider.” My intention in writing this “book,” for lack of a better word, was not to judge Kate Gosselin, but rather to present information that I learned in the past several years that might hopefully, somehow, help eight of the most beautiful children I have ever met.

  I’m not a professional writer, obviously, and I have no ambitions of becoming a writer or anything of the kind. I’m just a mediocre guy from small-town Pennsylvania; a simple father of three. My involvement in this story and in the lives of the Gosselins happened by chance, and perhaps by fate.

  This book is an unpolished look at the real Kate Gosselin; a collection of my observations, experiences and findings. It’s a little bit rough around the edges, and I like it that way. I’d rather you read my exact thoughts and not the thoughts of high-priced editors who altered the text according to their own line of thinking.

  I started writing this book while working professionally covering Jon and Kate, but then ended the project all together when the massive story died down. I had mistakenly thought that the exploitation of the Gosselin children would end once they were no longer being forced to film a television show for the world’s entertainment. I was wrong.

  This story started for me in the summer of 2009. I had lost one of my two full-time jobs and was working from home as an art director for two record companies, one of my two careers for the past 15 years. Money was very tight for my wife and me, as it was for many people. With the economy tanking, and with three small children of our own, I was getting desperate for work.

  I was in my home office one morning when my phone rang. It was my wife, Dana, calling from her office at the Reading Eagle, the local newspaper where I had also once worked for 21 years as a graphic designer and web designer. Dana told me she had just gotten a call and that she might have some freelance work for me if I was interested. Before she even finished her sentence I said, “I’ll take it! I don’t care what it is. We need the money!”

  Dana’s phone call was from US Weekly, and they were looking for someone local to cover the Jon and Kate Gosselin story. They had contacted Dana because she was the first person on record to publicly question Kate Gosselin’s parenting methods, and to write about Kate and the Gosselin saga, before it even was. Several years ago, Dana had a very successful online blog on the paper’s website, and one of the hot topics for her at the time, and that generated the most heated discussion, was Kate Gosselin, back before she was a household name.

  Dana had to pass on the US Weekly offer because she worked at the paper and wouldn’t be available for the full-time reporting that US Weekly was looking for. She recommended me for the job, and after a single phone call and a couple of emails I started reporting for US Weekly the next day. The job was only supposed to last a week or two, and I thought it would be fun.

  I knew Jon and Kate lived nearby, about 10 minutes away, but I had no idea exactly where. I had never happened across either of them in town, even though I’m a regular at many of the stores that Kate frequents, and I shop at the same grocery store as Kate.

  I had never seen their reality TV show, primarily because we didn’t have cable in our house – for the sake of our own children – and I had never so much as picked up a tabloid to read. Really. I certainly don’t consider myself to be above that sort of thing, I just really don’t care about other people’s problems since I have enough of my own.

  I had heard all of the negative comments about Kate Gosselin from Dana and her fellow bloggers years before, but I went into this job completely open minded, unbiased and with no real pre-conceived idea
s about Jon or Kate. I certainly had no intention of judging either of them. Being a flawed person myself, I’m the last person to judge anyone. My job for US Weekly was simply to report what I saw.

  As the father of three beautiful children, whom my world revolves around, I went into my assignment with a parent’s perspective, and I paid very close attention to the kids – how they behaved and how they were treated.

  Throngs of media and paparazzi had already been stalking this family for two months before I arrived at the Gosselin home on Heffner Road in Lower Heidelberg Township, PA. Up until then, they had basically resigned themselves to staring at the house from behind a fence a football field away, looking at the family through long lenses and following them on their everyday travels.

  As a tabloid reporter, I was paid to be at the Gosselin house every day, taking notes on EVERYTHING I saw and heard, no matter how minor, right down to what Kate was wearing and what she bought at the grocery store. Each night I would type up my notes and email them to my editor at the magazine. Those notes were kept on file for the next week’s magazine, for possible use in a story.

  “What did Kate buy at the grocery store?” was a very big story back then for the person who had worked the local Gosselin beat for US Weekly before me.

  That all changed in a New York minute.

  When I got to the Gosselin house that first day, Jon had, just two days prior, hired a “management team” from New York City and was starting to take control of his own image. If only he could go back and have a do-over on that decision. That was the real beginning of the end for him.

  Jon’s new philosophy worked in my favor for longevity on the job though, because now he was talking more to people at the house, and an hour into my first day at the fence I was face to face with him having a one-on-one conversation. Jon and I clicked instantly, I think, because I was local; I was a father of three kids the same ages as his, who were going to the same school as he did when he was younger; and I had been through a failed marriage of my own. At first, we just talked about nothing. He could see that I really didn’t care about who he was and what his problems were and that I was just there doing a job to support my family.

  I like Jon Gosselin - a lot. He’s my friend. I like Jon Gosselin’s family as well. Hanging out with Jon is like hanging out with any of your friends. It’s relaxed and usually uneventful, and we both like it that way. Except for time spent with my children, I lead a very boring life, and I have fun when I’m with Jon. I’ve traveled with him and partied with him and have been with him through his highest highs and his lowest lows. Jon is a regular guy who has gotten himself into a very bad situation. He tasted fame for a few minutes and it got the best of him. Like most people, Jon is flawed.

  No matter what he’s done or what people have written about him, I have never once seen Jon act in a rude manner to anyone, or act like he was better than anyone, even when he was being treated like a rock star and on top of the world in Las Vegas hosting a celebrity pool party at the MGM Grand’s Wet Republic. I was there with him, “working” for US Weekly. Jon has always acted like a regular guy, and he has always treated me, and every other media person, fairly – even when I was helping to destroy his life by reporting his every move to my employer.

  It made me sick to my stomach at times, doing this job, but Jon knew my family and our financial situation, and he understood that I needed to work to feed my kids as well. All he ever asked of me was that I tell the truth about what I saw.

  All that being said, none of it is why this book is mainly about Kate. There just really aren’t too many more things that can be written about Jon. The tabloids, mine included, and countless media outlets and bloggers have dragged him over the coals and through the mud and back, while a lot of the time giving Kate a free pass.

  Did Jon deserve a lot or most of the criticism and mudslinging that he received? Of course he did. He’s received a lot of very bad advice from unscrupulous people, and he’s made one bad decision after another since I’ve known him. He got caught up in the excitement of being a “celebrity.” Jon got into bed with the wrong people, perhaps literally and figuratively, and he’s paying a heavy price even today. I believe Jon when he says that he was acting out after his behind-closed-doors split with Kate because he got married and took on so much responsibility when he was just 22. He was trying to get back some of what he missed out on. This doesn’t excuse his behavior, but it does explain it.

  Meanwhile, Kate Gosselin continued to be immune from criticism. She strutted around like a peacock with her head held high – with her bodyguards, her handlers and public relations team, her media trainer, her team of lawyers, and her protective Network family feeding her a script of talking points for the week – pretending to be mother-of-the-year, and fooling millions of people while pursuing her Hollywood lifestyle on the backs of her eight beautiful children.

  I don’t like that last part.

  So why have I written this book? Some people insist it is for the money. It is not. With the size of the book running through Amazon’s self-publishing division, I would have to pay them for each copy sold. I did the math. A book half this size would gross me $2.00 per book after Amazon’s cut.

  If anything, I’ll be sued by one or more parties before this is over, so the thought of any profit from this project is not even a consideration.

  I have received “cease and desist” letters from Williams & Connolly LLP, the law firm that represents Discovery Communications, Inc. TLC and Discovery Talent Services, Inc. (“Discovery”), and from Lavely & Singer, the firm representing Kate. The letter on behalf of Discovery expressed concern that my book contained Discovery’s trade secrets and other confidential information protected by law. The letter from Kate’s attorney was more heavy handed and threatening. But it is very telling that neither firm accused me of writing untruths or disputed the facts I have presented. Even Kate, who takes to Twitter to attack anyone who even hints at criticizing her, has not denied any of what I have written. She can’t deny it because many of the words that form this book are her own.

  I am not trying to ruin Kate or destroy her life. I wish her a long and successful career at whatever she ends up doing – but I would love it if she would leave her kids out of her quest to retain her celebrity and give them back what’s left of their childhoods, while they still have a chance to be young and innocent.

  I would also love for this book to cause people to question why TLC and Discovery kept filming this family for five seasons knowing full well that Kate Gosselin was abusing her children. I have been told that there is much footage of this that obviously never saw, and will never see, the light of day.

  It will be simple, if necessary, for me to prove that I had intended to write a book on my experiences as a tabloid reporter in 2009, in partnership with a colleague of mine. We had met with a publisher in Manhattan who was interested in backing the book, and I came home excited that I had a new project. But a short time later, after getting to know the Gosselin kids, I decided that I didn’t want anything to do with a book that could potentially cause them even more harm. I also wasn’t happy with my partner’s tactics and the direction in which he was taking the book. My decision to not continue with him also cost me a friendship.

  So no, I did not write this book for money. I wrote it for the Gosselin kids.

  My experiences with the Gosselin children, especially Collin, are priceless to me.

  Even though every embarrassing moment of their lives up to this point has been documented for all the world to see, first by Jon and Kate and a film crew, then by Kate and a film crew, Kate continues to exploit her children today. She tweets about them, and blogs about them, and complains about them, and posts photos of them on her personal website and on Twitter. Photos of the children in their bathing suits and photos of the children in bed. I personally find that disgusting.

  I mention the children as little as possible in this book, to respect what’s left of their privacy. B
ut since they are the reason this book was necessary, I will share a personal story.

  One day, back in 2009, knowing how strict Kate is with the kids about them not eating anything even remotely fun, I brought them two big boxes of Dunkin Donuts. Their eyes lit up like Christmas morning, and they dug into them and couldn’t eat them fast enough. (I had checked with Jon first to make sure that nobody had a peanut allergy or anything of the sort.) After a few minutes, Collin had icing all over his face and a donut in each hand. There was one donut left in the box, and he said to me in his precious little voice, “Robert, will you hold that donut for me until I finish these two? I really want it, but I can’t carry it.”

  Then one of the little girls reprimanded me in a stern voice, saying “Mommy doesn’t let us eat sweets!” and I acted surprised and said, “Oh, I’m sorry. I won’t bring anymore donuts to the house, I promise.” And she said in a quieter voice, “Oh no, Robert, you bring us more donuts.”

  And my heart melted.

  Whenever I was with the kids, or my kids were playing with them and it was time for us to go, Collin would ALWAYS make sure to come and give us big hugs and kisses and say goodbye. Always. And when I’d look back as I was walking away, he’d still be waving to us. He has so much love to give and his heart is so big.

  In 2010, two of these sweet kids, Collin being one of them, were EXPELLED from KINDERGARTEN for acts of violence and for using foul language. When I saw Kate go on television to deny they had been expelled and to blame Jon and the stress of the divorce as the reason they were acting out, I knew I had to at least tell what I know, and what I’ve seen. I hope that maybe, just maybe, someone will step in to help them. I don’t know whom, and I don’t know how, but something needs to be done – for the sake of the children.

  This book contains information I have come to learn, both personally and through exhaustive research, while reporting for US Weekly and in the days since. I have had no official conversations at all with any of the Gosselin extremists – the bloggers. Also, I have not interviewed Aunt Jodi and Uncle Kevin or anyone connected with them, as they have been accused by Kate and her supporters of having their own personal agenda.